24: A Reflection
July 25th As I write this, I am trying hard not to panic about my day ahead or, failing that, trying not to succumb to the panic and spend all day in bed. I am anxious because I have no plan, nor do I have the balls to do the difficult work of trying to make a plan. This is not to say that I don't know what I want out of life (which is another issue altogether), but rather that I don't know how to get there. A part of me hopes that this is a part of life and that not all who wander are lost, but I am a person that likes knowing what is next. I've always taken the next step, k nowing that there is a step to be taken. Now, I can't see the step and I have no idea where I am going. I know I want success, but I don't know why I want it for myself because every time I do well in something, I immediately feel like I don't deserve it or like a mistake was made. I know I want to be strong, determined and tenacious. I know I want to be assertive and I know that I need t...